


Starscream X Reader – Undeserving

by writeyouin



Category: Transformers: Prime
Genre: Angst, F/F, F/M, Kind of depressing really so enjoy sadness bitches, Reader-Insert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-10
Updated: 2019-03-10
Packaged: 2019-11-14 23:14:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,149
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18062039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writeyouin/pseuds/writeyouin
Summary: Request: When Starscream first meets you, he expects to hate you. Imagine his surprise to find someone genuinely cares for him. However, even Cybertronians understand that you must let go of the things you love most.





	Starscream X Reader – Undeserving

Starscream gritted his dentae, hissing as he forced his arm to bend, breaking free of the icy build-up within his joints. The cold was locking up his mechanics every few clicks, but that was the cost of setting up his base in the Antarctic. His current problems of freezing up could be easily rectified if he went inside, but he couldn’t bring himself to… not yet anyway.

Until now, he thought the day had went well. He’d taken a risk, attacking the Autobots for some much energon in one of the dilapidated mines, long since picked dry by Megatron. Instead of finding energon, Starscream managed to capture you from that bumbling oaf Bulkhead. After that, he’d taken you back to his base where he’d formed the perfect plan to trade you for a functioning T-Cog; it was simple and elegant. Starscream didn’t care where the Autobots got the T-Cog from, they could tear one out of themselves for all he cared, so long as he got one; hell, they probably would do that to save one of their pet humans, but what did it matter? They weren’t flyers anyway, inferior Autobots.

By all accounts, Starscream should have been happy, but as he felt the ice locking up his knee joints, he still didn’t want to go inside. Although he’d never met you before, he remembered all previous encounters with the other Autobot pets. They were rude and full of insults which he pretended to ignore until the time to recharge came, when the ugly words scarred his mind, almost making him believe them. Despite always claiming to be perfect, after millennia of being harassed and tortured for any minor inconvenience, it was becoming increasingly difficult for Starscream to view himself as anything but worthless.

With a heavy sigh, Starscream fought away the darkness in his processor that threatened to be his downfall. He left the icy tundra in favour of the base which could protect him from the cold but left him vulnerable to the much shaper attack of your words.

Putting up his usual façade of confidence and superiority like a knight donning armour, Starscream passed you, frowning when you said nothing. He turned to check you were still there, despite knowing escape was impossible. Sure enough, you were huddled in the corner, rubbing your arms to keep warm; Starscream didn’t recognise the action and he didn’t care enough to ask what you were doing.

Under Starscream’s scrutinous glare, you began feeling awkward; maybe that was why you gave a small wave. Starscream stepped back, shocked by the action.

“Sorry,” You said bashfully, retracting your hand. “I don’t really know what the social convention is for being uh… kidnapped.”

“…Yes, well… It’s not that,” Starscream answered almost dutifully.

You nodded slowly, “Right, yep, noted. I um- Sorry, could you tell me what you’re planning to do with me? I mean, I don’t really know what the protocol is for this, usually you take Miko or Raf, y’know.”

Starscream eyed you curiously.

You felt more pressure to end the silence, “I um- I think I’ve made things weird and not the good weird, it’s more like the weird you get when you call a teacher dad or something. Should we start again? I feel like we should. You should go out and come back in and I’ll be quiet and then you can say something, and I’ll follow your lead.”

Starscream had no intention of repeating the unusual interaction, but he did find your assessment correct; the situation had indeed become ‘weird.’ Despite the unusual situation, he was glad he didn’t have to deal with the usual insults, escape attempts, and general bad behaviour; it was about time he got a reasonable captive.

“To be honest,” You babbled, “I’m just glad you came back. You pretty much left straight after putting me in here and without you, I’d starve. You shouldn’t just leave like that okay? What if something bad happened to you? I can’t call for help in here, what would happen to you then?”

“I won’t kill you, human,” Starscream said in an attempt to regain control of the derailed conversation.

“I gathered that much, but it still begs the question, what are you going to do with me?”

He grinned, eager to monologue his brilliant plan to a civilised hostage for once. “Well, if you must know human-”

“(Y/N).”

“What?”

“My name,” You told him. “It’s (Y/N). Sorry, no more interruptions, carry on. I was just setting the record straight… Take it away.”

Starscream bit back a lopsided grin, turning it into his trademark scowl. How was it possible for you to be so awkwardly uncharismatic? More importantly, why did he find your social ineptitude so endearing? Concluding that he was simply starved of intelligent conversation, Starscream continued, “Whatever hu- Ah, (Y/N). To put it simply for your tiny organic brain, I’m going to trade you back to the Autobots for a T-Cog.”

“What’s a T-Cog?”

Starscream rolled his eyes, wondering how he was going to get anything done with your constant interruptions.

“You don’t need to know what it is, only that I plan to trade you for one.”

“Does it have something to do with your alt-mode?” You persisted.

“How did you-”

“When we were in the mines… You didn’t use your alt mode. To be honest, I’m impressed you managed it, I mean, your missiles must be very effective to trump Bulkhead’s brute strength. Oh, and how did you get the ground-bridge to work without a console? Did you rig it up to a remote or something?”

Starscream was astonished that you’d figured all that out from an educated guess. If he was honest, the ground-bridge remote didn’t work according to plan; after he’d taken you, and barely escaped through it, the remote lost all power and without the proper tools, he knew he wouldn’t be able to repair it. “Ugh, why do you ask so many incessant questions?” He huffed. “Never mind, I have much work to do-”

“Do you have more plans?”

“Excuse me?”

“Unless you have more plans that I don’t know about, you don’t really have that much work to do. All you have to do is call the Autobots with your demands, right?”

“Uh, well I-”

You patted the floor, indicating for Starscream to sit outside your cell.

“You expect me to lower myself and sit on the floor?” He said disgustedly.

You shrugged, “Sit, don’t sit. Either way, I think you have time to talk with me, come tell me about yourself.”

Starscream stared at you somewhere between hope and suspicion, “Why?”

You smiled, “Would you relax? I can’t do anything from in here, I just wanted to understand you better. You seem like a smart guy, I think it’ll be nice having you to talk to while I’m here, and from the looks of things, I’d wager you’d like a bit of decent conversation as well, right? So, tell me about yourself.”

Starscream raised an eyebrow plate before relenting, “Very well, I suppose I could spare a few clicks.”

* * *

 

Starscream didn’t know what he as doing, hanging around with you like you were his equal. He’d even considered letting you out of your cell more than once, which was insane; if you were free, you would run, and he refused to lose you like that. He hadn’t even called the Autobots yet, and they were bound to be searching for you and him by now; it had been exactly three weeks since your capture, so they had to be closing in on his location.

Starscream desperately needed a T-Cog, he didn’t feel whole without one, yet if he gave you back would he be left with the same kind of emptiness? Were you now a part of him like his T-Cog had once been? No, it would be far worse to lose you because unlike a T-Cog, you had the capability to care for him, evidently valuing him for some reason he didn’t understand.

Starscream growled, careful to keep the sound low as he sat in the dark, watching you sleep, ever peaceful in your cell. What he needed was another plan, one that would guarantee him both you and a new T-Cog. He considered the conundrum for a long time, attempting to come up with anything that would help. If he was aboard the Nemesis with all his previous resources such a plan would be easy, but now he had nothing and thinking of the past wasn’t helping.

You shivered in your sleep, an action Starscream now understood. He sighed, knowing the only way he could keep you truly warm would be to hold you against his spark. What was he thinking? He was thinking of you like a spark-mate, not a prisoner or even a friend. How much longer could he lie to himself? Eventually, his walls would crumble, and he feared what would happen when they did.

He got up silently, leaving you to your world of dreams. He would return to you in the morning, hopefully with a plan that would allow him to keep you.

* * *

 

Starscream put up a front on confidence to greet you the next morning. “Are you awake yet (Y/N)? I want to talk more about-”

He stopped, gasping anxiously at the sight that met him. You were stood in the corner, holding the wall for support, purging your tank of the little contents it had left. The food Starscream had brought for you was supposed to last a few days, but it had been weeks and you’d carefully rationed everything you had, until finally, your weakened body could no longer handle the strain.

“(Y/N)…” Starscream whispered. “WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU?! Is this one of those awful human processes that’s normal? If so, you will be cleaning it up.”

You shuddered, groaning when you were apparently done, “Don’ feel so good.”

Starscream panicked at your lack of a comeback, you were supposed to laugh it off and tell him you were glad he was concerned; you always saw through him, why didn’t you say anything about his façade now? “What’s happening? Is it the cold?”

You took one wobbly step from the corner before losing your balance and stumbling to the floor.

Starscream lowered the cell’s barrier, dropping to his knees and picking you up. He cradled you close to his spark, which radiated warmth even behind the thick metal plating that protected it. “See,” he said, “I can keep you warm… I can fix this.”

Your head rolled back as you lost consciousness. Starscream knew this was more than a simple matter of cold; he also knew he wasn’t equipped to heal a sick human. Carrying you over to the computer console, he found Prime’s contact details, hesitating to make the call, all too aware that if he did, he’d lose you.

“I- I don’t want to let you go. You won’t come back…  _Nobody_  ever comes back.”

Coolant leaked from his optics. He quivered, unable to remember the last time he’d cried. How were you able to elicit such powerful emotions in him after only three weeks? Mixed in with the sadness was a feeling he’d only ever hear of, yet he recognised it instantly. Guilt. He felt guilty that he’d somehow caused you to be ill.

“I’m sorry,” He said, pressing his helm into your clammy skin. “How could I ever think that you could be with a monster like me… Dreams are a waste of time.”

He pulled himself together long enough to place you gently on the computer console, which he then used to call Optimus Prime. “Filthy Autobot, I’m sending coordinates to your disgusting human pet. After all this time it didn’t know anything; torturing it was useless after all.”

With that lie, Starscream hung up, leaving the base without so much as a look back. He wondered if you would ever come to know the reason he lied, should you live. He hoped you knew it was so the Autobots would take every precaution to keep you away from him; clearly, he couldn’t be trusted to protect you himself.

After staying out in the cold as long as he could do so without shutting down, Starscream risked going back into the base. As suspected, the Autobots had clearly used a ground-bridge to collect you; they’d probably left immediately afterwards, seeing the state you were in.

Dejectedly, Starscream went to your cell, unable to tear his optics from the stale vomit in the corner. This was for the best, you deserved the world, and he had to suffer the inevitably long life of a Cybertronian alone. He punched the wall, buckling against it afterwards and crying for the second time that day; once again he had failed, but for the first time in his life, it mattered.


End file.
